TO THE WORLD.
Joongboer



SHIMIN
Thirteen,16 April.
CHIJ St.Joseph's Convent,Girl Guides.
I'm a TRIPLE S, JOONGBOER, HENECIA, TAECZY SHIPPER, HOTTEST & SAY A!
HWANGBO HYEJUNG 황보 혜정
SS501
KIM HYUN JOONG 김현중
KIM KYU JONG 김규종
PARK JUNG MIN 박정민
KIM HYUNG JUN 김형준
HEO YOUNG SAENG 허영생
2PM OK TAECYEON 옥택연
MISS A SUZY 배수지
LEE HYORI 이효리
SNSD TIFFANY HWANG 황미영
SNSD SUNNY LEE 이순규
F(X) VICTORIA SONG 빅토리아 송

:
2NE1;Sandara Park
SNSD;SeoHyun/Yuri/Taeyeon/SooYoung/Jessica
WonderGirls;Kim Yoobin
CNBlue;Yonghwa/Jungshin
f(x);Luna
A PINK; Park ChoRong/Kim NamJoo
After School; UEE/Kahi
Lee SiYoung, Son Dambi, Kim SoEun, Rain, Lee MinJeong

You hate JoongBo,I hate you.

"I hope your love is always happy" - Hwang Bo

MSN Facebook Tumblr

Twitter Updates

    FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER


    Missions

    Kim Hyun Joong "Break Down" album
    Kyu Jong come SG
    See Hyun Joong again
    f(x) Pinocchio Album
    A PINK Seven days of Spring Album
    Watch Hoodwinked 2
    Watch "Playful Kiss"
    Kim Kyu Jong keychain
    Kim Kyu Jong nametag
    SS501 nametag
    Kim Hyun Joong nametag
    SS501 Cup
    SS501 Balloon
    SS501 Persona in Seoul first stage concert DVD
    SS501 Persona in Japan concert DVD
    SS501 Special edition albums (ALL)
    Kim Kyu Jong,Kim Hyun Joong photo
    SS501 badge
    SS501 poster
    SS501 file
    Kim Hyun Joong file
    Playful Kiss DVD
    Rollerblading with Regine&Wanling
    Yellow Handphone Strap
    New Swimsuit


    Segyero



    The Ssangchus

    JOONGBO♥SSANGCHU

    TripleS Singapore
    Hwang Bo Cyworld
    Kim Hyun Joong Korea Official Site

    Kim Hyun Joong Japan Official Site
    Hyunniespexers
    Lovekimhyunjoong
    Love501
    Investigation KHJ
    SS501 Homepage

    Amabel. Aruun. Ashley. Belinda. Candice. Catherine. Cassandra Lim. Cassandra Neo. Cynthia. Damien. Eunice. Felisa. HaiQi. Janice. Jinming. Keerthi. Lavinia. LeeMin. Nabillah. Peichi. Peixuan. Phyllis. Prissie. Rachel. Rebecca. Regine. Shermin. Sowmiya. Vanessa. Wanching. Wanling. Wendy. Wenwei. Yatie. Yiying.

    Running Out

    January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 July 2010 August 2010 September 2010 October 2010 November 2010 December 2010 January 2011 February 2011 March 2011 April 2011 May 2011 June 2011 July 2011 October 2011

    LISTEN

    MusicPlaylist
    Music Playlist at MixPod.com
    Let go.
    Tuesday, February 22, 2011 @ 6:13 PM




    I hope this tears will stop running someday
    Someday after this darkness clear up
    I hope the warm sunshine dries these tears

    When I feel that I’m getting tired of looking me exhausted
    I want to give all my dreams I’ve kept hard
    Every time I feel that I’m lacking in many things more than I have
    I lost strength in my legs and drop down

    I hope this tears will stop running someday
    Someday after this darkness clear up
    I hope the warm sunshine dries these tears

    Everyday I hold out comforting myself “it’ll be alright”
    But it makes me afraid little by little
    I tell myself to believe in myself, but I don’t
    Now I don’t know how longer I can hold out

    But wait it’ll come
    Although the night is long, the sun comes up
    Someday my painful heart will get well

    I hope it helps me now
    I hope the God will help me

    I don’t have enough confidence more and more to overcome myself

    I hope this tears will stop running someday
    Someday after this darkness clear up
    I hope the warm sunshine dries these tears

    But wait it’ll come
    Although the night is long, the sun comes up
    Someday my painful heart will get well

    Someday…
    Someday…


    FUCK YOU KAY.I TELL YOU FOR THE LAST TIME,WE.ARE.NOT.TOGETHER.ALREADY.I DON'T FUCKING CARE IF SHE'S THERE.I DON'T FUCKING CARE WHAT SHE'S DOING.I DON'T FUCKING CARE IF SHE'S SITTING OR STANDING.WHATEVER SHE IS DOING,IT.HAS.NOTHING.TO.DO.WITH.ME.SO STOP GIVING ME THOSE STARES WHENEVER YOU SEE HER AND STOP TALKING TO ME ABOUT HER CAUSE I.DON'T.FUCKING.CARE. THE NEXT TIME YOU TRY TO SAY WE'RE TOGETHER AGAIN I'LL JUST FUCKING SLAP YOU IN THE FACE.

    Just when I thought I was going to start again,you popped into my mind.When will I ever get over this?

    Labels: , ,

    It's beautiful.
    Monday, February 21, 2011 @ 6:26 PM



    Everything felt different today.
    Probably cause I let everything out last night.
    Just looking at the sky,looking at the clouds and the leaf falling from the tree.
    It looks almost magical.Like everything is beautiful once again.
    I hope to feel this peace more often.
    And yeah,I might still think of you.But I'm thinking about the good times.
    And I'll always be hoping for a day where we'll be like last time again.

    Labels: ,

    It's okay even if i'm hurt
    Sunday, February 20, 2011 @ 4:32 PM


    Seohyun - It's okay even if I'm hurt.

    It's okay even if I can't see
    It's okay even if I can't breath
    If I could meet you only once
    If I could give you all my heart

    How much more do I have to miss you
    So that maybe you could know my heart?
    How much more do I to cry and cry
    So that tears could be dry?

    Does it hurt because of loving you?
    Is it the punishment for loving you so much?
    Even though you say that I can lose everything
    It's okay if I just have you to be with me

    Even if my heart is broken when loving you
    Even if my heart is separated when waiting for you
    It's okay because I love you
    It's okay even if I get hurt

    The farther I turn away so as to forget you
    The more I miss you, What can I do
    Even when you keep telling me it's not right just

    to keep me away from you
    You are the only one to me, What can I do

    Does it hurt because of loving you?
    Is it the punishment for loving you so much?
    Even though you say that I can lose everything
    It's okay if I just have you to be with me

    Even if my heart is broken when loving you
    Even if my heart is separated when waiting for you
    It's okay because I love you
    It's okay even if I get hurt

    Even if I get poisoned and pricked
    My love for you can't stop
    I will wait for you until forever
    I will endure even if it hurts and hurts

    Because of loving you more
    It's okay even if tears fall down

    Labels: ,

    Kyu updates.
    @ 2:12 PM
    Credit: http://www.allkpop.com/2011/02/ss501s-kim-kyu-jong-on-acting-his-group-and-their-new-album#disqus_thread

    After parting ways with DSP Media last year, the members of SS501 have demonstrated what it was like to be ’separate but together’. Kim Hyun Joong has established himself as an actor, and Park Jung Min returned with his first solo album, “Not Alone“.

    Kim Kyu Jong is also standing before the starting line of his new acting career after he joined B2M Entertainment, the agency of fellow member Heo Young Saeng.

    The aspiring actor recently took part in an interview with Daily Sports and revealed that he will be working against his ‘flower boy’ charms in an attempt to become a more skilled actor.

    -

    Q. “How’s it like working on your own now?”

    Kyu Jong: “It makes me think a lot about being with my members. We used to joke and play around without rest, but now that I’m alone, the feeling’s difficult to express. It feels kind of empty.”

    Q. “Are you studying acting now?”

    Kyu Jong: “I get trained about two to three times a week for two hours at a time. When I was with SS501, I received some acting experiences through music videos and variety programs; now that I’m entering the world of professionals, I have to do it properly. There’s a lot of pressure, but my eyes have been opened to the charms of acting, and I’m full with excitement. There’s a drama I’m currently in discussions for, so the decision will be out soon.”

    Q. “What kind of actor do you want to become?”

    Kyu Jong: “I want to succeed with my skills, not with my ‘flower boy’ image. I am a part of a ‘flower boy’ group, but that doesn’t make me one. …I’m planning to prepare myself so that I can act in a way that delivers my emotions to the audience. I love actor Ha Jung Woo’s acting, so I study his works a lot. He’s especially amazing in the movie, ‘Amazing Day.’”

    Q. “Do you meet with the SS501 members often?”

    Kyu Jong: “All five of us haven’t been able to meet at one location yet because one or two is always out on another schedule. Young Saeng-hyung is in the same agency as me, so we meet often and give each other advice. He’s preparing for his solo album right now, and I accompanied him on his trip to the U.S. and met his album representatives; I also got to listen to his songs. I call Jung Min often and even monitor his stages. Sometimes I’ll even grab drinks with Hyun Joong-hyung.”

    Q. “You must be worried about different things now that your solo activities are coming up.”

    Kyu Jong: “Before, the members could carry me, but now I have no one to depend on and must take responsibility for myself. Of course I’m worried, but I’m sure I’ll improve myself through this opportunity. I’ve begun to see things that I didn’t notice when we were together. I’ll see the members doing their individual activities and wonder to myself where these different images they’re expressing were hiding. Every time I feel that they’ve grown. I feel really proud and become motivated to do better myself. I think we’ve become like a whip for one another.”

    Q. “Aren’t there a lot of hardcore SS501 fans?”

    Kyu Jong: “I once told my fans to restrict waiting outside our homes; in return, I would treat them better in concert or broadcast halls. Ever since then, there’s been a lot less sasaeng fans. My father often tells me to treat them well when they come to me, because who will be there 10 years from now. It’s true, don’t you think? I live feeling thankful that they like me.”

    Q. “When will SS501’s album be released?”

    Kyu Jong: “I’m thinking sometime near the year-end. Our agencies are all different, so it’s difficult to get things moving. Since all of our members are on the same page of remaining together, the results of that desire will come out soon.”

    Source: JoongAng Daily via Nate

    Retrieved from: SgTripleS

    Labels: , ,

    Thanks for making my mood even worse.
    @ 12:21 PM




    FUCK.


    Hey,thanks for making my mood even worse than before.
    Please spare a thought for others before making last minute plans okay?
    Cause FYI, I DON'T LIVE VERY NEAR and I CAN'T GO OUT AS AND WHEN I LIKE.
    So next time,if the plan is gonna be last minute,then don't include me in.
    I ask you to come with me,cause if I ever need to cry,I'll choose to cry in front of someone who cares.

    Labels: ,

    It's better today.It'll be better tomorrow.
    Saturday, February 19, 2011 @ 5:42 PM




    It's better today.It'll be better tomorrow.
    Had GG Thinking Day celebration at Sengkang Secondary today.
    Went to Eunice's house early in the morning to ask her mum help me tie hair. :/
    I feel bad for always troubling her mum.My mum should go and learn how to tie.
    Had such a hard time tying the scarf.In the end Eunice help me and only do one time then perfect already.Tsk.I'm so stupid.
    Walked to school together,met Nerine and co. at canteen.
    Gather at basketball court then WALKED to SKSS.
    Saw some familiar faces.Surprised that they're in guides.
    Thinking Day celebration was really boring.
    I don't wish to go next year but I have to.
    Anyway,SJC guides won BRONZE award for the Thinking Day song video thing,I think.
    Which means we'll get extra LEAPs points. (Y)
    Finally celebration ended.
    Had lunch with Nerine at compass then went home.

    It isn’t the ignoring that hurts ,But what hurts is that we use to talk everyday , say hi , the hugs,the smile and now we’re nothing…

    There comes a point in your life when you realize who matters, who never did, who won’t anymore, and who always will. And in the end you learn who is fake, who is true and who would risk it all for you.

    It’s terrible and awful when someone leaves you. You can move on, do the best you can, but an ending is an ending. No matter how many pages of sentences and paragraphs or great stories it leads up to, it will always have the last word.


    You think I hate you? THINK AGAIN.

    Labels: , , ,

    Just trying.
    Friday, February 18, 2011 @ 8:39 PM


    Finally it's Friday.I've been in a bad mood for almost a week.
    Hope no more of this next week.
    School was annoying as usual.I feel like just asking everyone to shut up and stop bothering me.
    Hiaz,seriously,I'm gonna end up offending a lot of people if my mood don't improve.
    Was happy with my maths results but totally didn't expect it.
    So hopefully I won't have any B/Cs this time.
    Then I can bargain with my dad to reactivate my SIM card.I need to text and call.):
    HEATs is coming.Totally unprepared. :/ Nerine better go running again with me soon!
    MDM Y is seriously irritating me.
    PLEASE JUST START TEACHING US SOMETHING AND STOP LETTING US DO STUPID WORKSHEETS.Everytime keep asking us do worksheet worksheet,might as well print the whole book for us.
    Had cca after school.
    Guides was fun today.I look forward to tomorrow.(: It'll be interesting...I guess.Haha.
    Gonna go Eunice house tomorrow.I feel bad for always troubling her mum.):

    We spent so much time with each other that people thought we were together...

    Labels: , ,

    LOVE?
    Thursday, February 17, 2011 @ 8:14 PM




    You can’t tell someone you love them and then change your mind. That is not how it works. Once you love someone, you always love them. Don’t you? Isn’t there a part of you who thinks of him/ her for no reason whatsoever? They will always be in the back of your mind and no matter how much you love someone else, you always love him/ her too.
    Feeling so tired now.Running with muscle ache just kills you for a while.
    Got back only 3 CT papers.The teachers are so slow.Esp. MDM Y.
    So far quite okay,no Bs/Cs YET.Surprised at bio results for the class and myself.
    A lot of things coming up.I feel so stressed out.
    Hope TS charity event will help me feel a little better.Doing something for a good cause.
    And also doing it for Kyu. <3
    Gonna go swimming/running again I guess.
    Felt so pathetic today.Stamina dropped so much.
    Stupid guy run so funny,made me laugh and then timing increase.
    I don't know why but my mood is just so bad.
    I feel bad for ignoring my friends when they ask me something just cause I don't want to answer it.What's wrong with me.
    More things I heard that's making me flare up.
    GG Day is coming.Looking forward to tomorrow.
    I'm gonna learn how to fold paper cranes and turtles soon.For JoongBo's sake.
    Thanks for making me feel this way.I'm sure you know I'm talking about you.

    Labels: , , ,

    Put the awkwardness aside.
    Wednesday, February 16, 2011 @ 5:52 PM

    Awkwardness aside,we're closer than before.

    I realised I've been spending a lot of time with you nowadays.
    It sort of feels good.I feel so safe with you.It feels like I could tell you everything.
    But I know I'll have to keep them to myself no matter what.
    It feels horrible not to have someone who understands enough for me to talk to.

    Anyway,school has been pretty annoying.
    I'm annoyed by the teachers who can't teach (MDM Y.)
    I'm annoyed by the people who ate in class today and got caught by Mr Fan.
    They're gonna get us in trouble sooner or later.
    I'm annoyed by the noise the class makes when I'm trying to concentrate.
    I'm annoyed by people who bugs me now and then.
    Well,I'm just annoyed with almost everything today.
    Let's hope that my mood will improve soon.): I don't like the pissed off feeling.

    HE was fun today.The cupcakes rock. ^^ HE is getting so fun now.I even like the coursework.
    But I don't know how to cook/prepare the healthy one-dish meal. :/
    PE was okay.I thought I'll be doing pacing today but we did exercises instead.
    I kept jumping so high and now my legs are butt hurts.
    But made improvements in crunches,push-ups and one other exercise (forgot the name).
    Chinese was super slack.Lavinia is going to Beijing too! (Y)
    Yay,got partner already.(: So looking forward to the trip now!^^
    Had lunch with Nerine and Santhiya today.Then took 965 with Nerine.
    Can't wait to go running with Nerine and Lavinia tomorrow.

    You know,you're making people dislike you more.

    Labels: , , , ,

    It's so hard to move on.
    Tuesday, February 15, 2011 @ 7:37 PM


    I GUESS I WANT YOU BACK.

    Urgh,my patience is wearing thin.I don't why,but anything and everything seems to make me lose my temper easily.
    Although it's only the second day of the week,I can predict that this week will be awful for me.
    I get affected so easily by what I hear and see.
    Well,moodswings are coming on.
    I seriously can't control my mind anymore.
    Maybe because this Valentines is spent differently, that's why I can't help but think of you A LOT.
    I'm unsure of my exact feelings now.
    I guess I want you back.
    I just don't have the courage to tell you that.And I don't want to be hurt by the same things all over again.
    I'm tired already.

    School sucks today.
    Felt so tired that I could just collapse.
    Eyebags are getting bigger and I think dark circles are gonna come soon.
    It's weird that I sleep so early but still feel so tired.
    Is it the crying? The worrying?
    Losing my appetite also.Can't seem to eat all three meals in one day.Must at least skip one.
    What's wrong with me?):
    Today,laughed a lot during English.
    Amelia is still a joker even though she's not trying during calligraphy.
    I find that I like to make fun of people a lot.Haha.
    Gonna write letters I guess...felt bad for receiving so many letters but never ever writing one to my friends.
    I'm gonna participate in TS charity event if Nerine wants to come with me.Hopefully she can.(:
    KYU'S b'day is coming soon.I'm gonna get started on my drawing. ^^
    Can't wait for March to come! So many exciting things coming up. :D

    Labels: ,

    Happy Valentines.
    Monday, February 14, 2011 @ 7:41 PM


    HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY
    Ah,it's 14 Feb again.Every year,everyone seems to make a big fuss out of Valentine's day.
    Like what's the big deal? To me,it's just a normal day.I don't feel the "love is in the air" feeling.
    Valentine's day just has no meaning for me,even if I'm attached.Haha.
    Thanks Natalie,Janice,Candice for the presents and letters and those who gave me hugs today.(:
    Especially Neka.She gave me a really looooonnnnnggggg hug.HAHA.
    CT1 ended today.FINALLY. :D
    Got back HCL papers,was super satisfied.I never expected to get A2,so felt really really happy.
    History lesson is getting more and more interesting! Can't wait for next lesson but Miss Sarah on course.TSK.I'd rather listen to her than do some SBQ.
    CXT sucks.Had to do some stupid Microsoft survey.Damn hard.Failed super terribly. 26/58. :/
    They say if fail have to go take IT lessons.Wth? -.-
    After school had lunch with Nerine,then met Natalie.
    Went to PS together to buy swimsuit.She choose for me.Turned out quite nice.Haha. ^^
    Took MRT home while she went to AMK.
    Felt super tired.It's like every step I take,my eyebags are gonna get bigger.Tsk.
    Stressed out.):
    Every year,I only buy one Valentines present.This year,it's still the same.
    But this time,I don't have the courage to give it to you anymore.
    Why did our friendship become like this?
    3 years of being together like sisters and now,it's gone just like that.
    I don't know if I should regret pointing out your lies.
    Things would have been just the same but you're still going to continue lying to me.
    I love you.

    Labels: ,

    It's love alright.
    Saturday, February 12, 2011 @ 4:56 PM
    IT'S LOVE ALRIGHT.

    Compared to the other couples, the both of them were relatively more awkward with each other when they started. However, although their conversations are sometimes stalled with moments of awkward silences, the both of them can be seen to be becoming more and more in tune with each other. Based on their dates of birth, fortune master Lee Kyung Min will study their individual love luck and their harmony, as well as ways for the both of them to appeal to each other. His remarks about Hyun Joong and Hwang Bo's union was "The older meets the younger, brings about harmony. Great."

    Hyun Joong's love luck:

    The chances of him meeting older women are higher. More older women will be attracted to him compared to younger women. This is because most older women would feel comfortable around him, resulting in his high popularity with older women.

    It is also likely that Hyun Joong will marry someone older than him. This type of birth details show that he is someone who is more delicate than he looks, somewhat similar to the psychology of a woman. It is because of this that it would be better to marry an older woman who could protect him.

    Plus, it would be better for him to marry early as it would enhance his fortune. A late marriage will not be lucky for him so it would be better to meet a woman early and marry while he is in his twenties or early thirties.

    Hwang Bo's love luck:

    She is exceptionally stubborn and proud, opinionated and is not the type to give in. As she would not be able to lead in a relationship with someone of the either the same age or older than her, it would be better for her to meet someone younger that she can lead. If she meets someone younger, their relationship would be a better match as they would be able to communicate and develop further.

    Based on her birth details, she is likely to marry late. Even if she meets a good person, it would be better for her to date him for one to three years before marrying him. Rather than getting married hastily, it would be better for her to get to know the person first before marrying him.

    Hyun Joong and Hwang Bo's marital harmony:

    As they are both a younger man- older woman couple, they are able to achieve harmony. They are a well fitted couple as the woman leads and the man follows. They are also a couple that would not have any huge arguments and their difference in age allows them to understand each other. Since their characters are at opposite ends of the pole, they are able to harmonize each other, which can be said to be a good thing.

    If Hyun Joong was to steal Hwang Bo's heart:

    As Hwang Bo's exterior seems to be tougher than a man, she naturally leads. However, Hyun Joong should also lead at times, showing his manly side and the side of him that he is able to lead. He shouldn't be timid and be more manly, knowing when to lead and not to, showing his charms which are appealing.

    If Hwang Bo was to steal Hyun Joong's heart:

    From his birth details, Hyun Joong is the type that likes women who can make him feel her warm side and are able to take care of him, showing him her heart. If she does this, then he will go towards her.

    source & translated by: chonsa@allseouldout
    credit: gall.dcinside.com


    She said that although she was a lot closer to Hyun Joong now, there was still a little awkwardness to some extent. However she felt that it was good that probably due to the awkwardness with each other, they treated each other with consideration and respect, making her think that it might be good to get married with someone who was younger.

    The both of them (Hyun Joong & Hwangbo) climbed Mount Halla (Halla San) and had a confirmation of their love. Although they cannot reveal what the exact outcome is, officials from WGM have said that it is a happy ending for the both of them.


    I'M DYING FROM HAPPINESS.

    Labels: ,

    Pretending or genuine?
    Friday, February 11, 2011 @ 10:32 PM

    Sigh,I feel so useless and troublesome today.
    Can't walk properly,then all my friends having to keep a slow pace with me/stop and wait for me.I just hate my stupid damn calf.
    Going to see doctor tomorrow.Hopefully can recover soon.
    I have many things coming up and I'm going to participate no matter what.But I don't want to be limping and slow others down.
    I feel like a burden to others.
    But somehow,this injury is like a blessing in disguise.
    Because of this injury,I actually found out that people actually care about me.
    Was so touched today by Nerine.
    She went to compass and took the long way home cause of me.And she said something that made me feel touched,shocked and really happy. She said "Even if my bus come,I won't board until I see you board your bus".
    This is the first time someone cared so much that they don't think about themselves and actually put me first.
    After being so used to having fake friends,it's shocking to know that there's actually people that are not pretending.
    Well,I still can't be sure whether their care and concern is genuine or just acting.
    I lost trust in everyone now that I even doubt my closest friends.
    I feel so pissed with myself.How many times must I tell myself that not everyone is like her?
    I couldn't help but think about you today.After that my mood totally went down.
    Why can't I just fucking forgot you?!
    It's surprising how I could like you when I barely even know you.
    It's funny how I used to not pay attention to you at all and now everything I see is you.
    When I see you,my heart just beats so fast and I have this weird feeling.
    But I hardly even know you,but I'm not prepared to get to know you better also.
    So,the thing is: Do I like you or not?
    I'm not 100% sure of my feelings yet,so I'll just let nature take it's course and see what fate has in stored for us.(:

    Around us, life bursts with miracles—a glass of water, a ray of sunshine, a leaf, a caterpillar, a flower, laughter, raindrops. If you live in awareness, it is easy to see miracles everywhere. Each human being is a multiplicity of miracles. Eyes that see thousands of colors, shapes, and forms; ears that hear a bee flying or a thunderclap; a brain that ponders a speck of dust as easily as the entire cosmos; a heart that beats in rhythm with the heartbeat of all beings. When we are tired and feel discouraged by life’s daily struggles, we may not notice these miracles, but they are always there.

    Labels: , , ,

    Dig it all out.I don't want to feel anymore.
    Thursday, February 10, 2011 @ 6:08 PM


    This week has been pretty much hell for me.
    CT1 is ending as quickly as it started.
    So far,there isn't a paper that make me say "I'll confirm fail" YET.Not even HCL.
    It turned out to be easier a little this year.
    Many things approaching: HEATS,Milo triathlon,Sports Day,Beijing.
    And guess what? I pulled my calf muscle at a time like this.
    Fuck.I'm super pissed off with myself.
    I feel like just fucking pulling my entire leg out.
    I feel so useless.I feel like a burden now with this fucking injury.
    It takes me sooooooo long to alight from the bus and walk to the interchange.
    I can't even catch up with my friends even when they're walking slowly.
    I can even do simple things like climb the staircase properly and walk.
    I look just so fucking stupid limping all the way.
    Stupid leg.I still want to do sports so please don't be a problem.
    Please let me recover soon.

    I feel like just fucking digging out my heart and soul.
    I don't want to feel anything anymore.
    It's so fucking annoying to always be reminded of you and feel sad all over again inside.
    I'm sick of this feeling and yet I'm not able to control it.
    I'm sick of crying already.
    I'm sick of always staring into space and think about you unintentionally.
    I shoudn't have befriend you seriously.
    Causing so much pain and hurt to me,I wonder if you know it.
    I heard something in history today that immediately made me think about you.
    The way you feel inside affects yourself physically.
    The emotional pain inside is now affecting me on the outside also.
    Why did I fucking treat you like a treasure when I was just your trash.
    Even after having so many reasons to hate you,I can't bring myself to.

    I drown myself in your voice to make me feel better for awhile.To be immune to all pain and for the tears to come naturally.You sang a song called "The Strength to Smile".I hope I'm going to have that soon.

    Labels: ,

    Would I?
    Tuesday, February 8, 2011 @ 8:11 PM




    If I were to rewind time,back to that day,will I choose to ignore what you did and continue being good friends? Or will I make the same decision as now and lose you but get someone better in return?
    Classes are going to start soon.
    Somehow,I want to see you,but at the same time,I also don't want to see you.
    I'm nervous as the day gets closer.
    How will I react.How will YOU react?
    Will the teachers think we're still good friends and pair us together again?
    Will it be really awkward? Will we quarrel in class?
    All these questions and doubts.I really dread class.
    If it means I will see you every week,I think I'd rather quit.
    What more hurt can you bring me? How much more lies can you tell?
    How much more can I take from you?
    It's stupid how I can still miss you.
    If I'm always being reminded of you,how can I forget?
    I'm stupid enough to let you into my heart.Now I can't remove.
    I bet I'm already gone from yours.
    This week is getting more and more stressful,especially today.
    Had to study for HCL and history.Regretted not studying yesterday.
    Spent almost the entire day studying.If it weren't for C's help,I wouldn't have been able to memorise everything.
    Went to Amelia's house today with Nerine.
    Bought KFC at compass,then took bus to her house.
    Studied chinese like crazy.Many funny moments.
    It's good to laugh.Felt more relaxed,carefree.
    But it didn't last long.
    Called C,asked her over to my house,she helped me study.
    The first thing she said when she saw me was, "Are you okay today?".
    Couldn't help but smile.Everytime she'll ask me this question before everything else.
    Sometimes,she'll know by just looking at my face.
    Someone could be so observant.
    Talked to her a little about upcoming class,back to the topic about her,felt so much better after that.
    She's gonna come over after CT.(:
    I'm gonna feel comfortable again.I wish you were in my school.):
    Perhaps she cares more than others,that's why I could only feel her concern.
    I don't even trust my closest friends and yet I could trust her.
    I don't feel awkward with her like how I feel sometimes with my friends.
    I just cannot imagine what would my life be if I didn't meet her.
    I'm fucking tired of having fake friends.Two-faced.Fake their concern,ditch about me behind my back.And endless lies.
    Backstab me for all I care.
    Even if everyone I know judge me,YOU won't ever.And I'm sure of that.
    I love you, CLKY.
    Thank YOU.
    Monday, February 7, 2011 @ 6:53 PM




    THANK YOU.

    Without you,I don't think I would have felt any better than before.
    Thank you for always listening.
    Always telling me to be strong.That she doesn't matter.
    Thank you for always cheering me up.No matter how many times I told you to leave me alone.
    Thank you for always being able to come over to lend me your shoulders to cry.
    Thank you for your countless advices.
    Thank you for never leaving me alone.
    Thank you for sacrificing your time for me.Even when you're busy,you dump everything for me.
    Thank you for not pretending.
    Thank you for pulling me up again.

    You're the best friend I've ever had.
    Before,when I had her,I didn't really take note of you.
    But the minute you knew what is going on,you came all the way to comfort me.
    I appreciate that.
    We weren't that close,so I didn't want to open up to you.
    But I don't know why,just with you there,I felt so comfortable.
    Finally someone cared.Genuinely.Not pretending.
    Sorry for the many times when I cried all over you.The thing is,you didn't even complain.
    You seem to know everything just by looking at me for one second.
    It's amazing.
    I tried to hide them all,but you saw through me.
    When you first knew of my problems,you didn't even try to dig the whole thing out of me.
    Maybe that's why I was willing to tell you all the things that I did not want to tell other people.
    I just want you to know that you mean the world to me.
    Much more than everyone else.
    You feel just like my sister sometimes.(:
    Anything and everything I can confide in you.
    You're the best thing I've ever had in my life so far.
    Thanks God for giving me someone like you to replace someone that's not even worth my tears.

    Everyone else I can give up.You,I cannot. I LOVE YOU. ALOT.

    Labels: , ,

    You.It's always YOU.
    Saturday, February 5, 2011 @ 3:29 PM




    I'VE GOT PLAYFUL KISS DVD.(Y)
    Well,at least I'm happy today.
    The funny thing is,everywhere I go,I always hope to bump into you.
    It's like I can feel you around me.):
    But the thing is,I can't forgive or forget...

    Labels: , , ,

    Love Pledges.
    Friday, February 4, 2011 @ 11:35 PM

    Hwangbo's Love Pledge

    For Shillang and Buin to have a good life!

    1. To not look at anyone other than wife as a woman
    2. To put yourself in the other person's shoes before saying something
    3. To spend the days off together
    4. To not drink often except on special occasions
    5. To call at least twice a day
    6. If you have an affair, do as wife says
    7. To have respect for each other and to always call me "Buin"
    8. To let each other see their first love, but not to tell anyone that the person was the first love

    ________________________


    The Pledge of Love, by Kim Hyunjoong

    Wherever I may be, I will get medicine when my wife is sick.
    I will never look at another woman,
    I am confident that I can overcome temptations and hardships.
    As I'm married, I will always be around my wife, just like oxygen.

    Well,at least I've got something to make me feel a little better today.(:

    Labels: ,

    What you see on the outside,is not what it really is on the inside.
    @ 10:39 PM

    I wonder if you feel the same.
    I might be cold to you on the outside,but I still wish we were good friends again on the inside.
    Seriously,you have no idea how much I still love you.
    You tell everyone that me and you are no longer friends,that you hate me and stuff.
    But I don't mind at all.
    It's just sad to see that our friendship were so fragile.
    That you never really took me seriously.
    Probably that's why you lied.
    Here I am,trying so hard to forget you,and there you are,making every process of forgetting you even more painful.

    Was shipped off to Gramps' house again cause parents had to work.
    Spent some time there,didn't feel like revising for geog.
    After a while,Big Aunt came with cousin and her bf.
    Took mrt with cousin and bf at around 12+ to go Plaza Sing.
    The shopping mall is so quiet.
    I wanted to buy new swimsuit but shop didn't open.): Comics didn't open also.
    Bought tickets to watch It's a Great Great World.
    The movie is quite boring,was disappointed.Expected something better.
    Went to Daiso to buy Dad's b'day present.Went Cotton On,and dvd shop.
    SAW PLAYFUL KISS DVD.
    I'm gonna go NP tomorrow to get it. :D
    Planning to buy Everlast singlets also.(:

    Went back to gramps' house.Had lunch.
    Relatives came after that.
    Read my mag. and listen to music.BOOORRRIIINNNGGGG.
    Finally had dinner,parents came and went home.
    CNY is so boring and quiet this year.):


    SMILE. It is a simple act, but sometimes takes a lot of effort. A smile can cause boundaries to melt, hearts to warm up, and distances to reduce. Why don't we smile more often? Is it too tough to smile? The answer lies in our attitude towards life. If we are more accepting of situations, we will be able to smile more easily.

    Source: leilockheart

    Labels: , , , ,

    JoongBo LOVE - I say a little prayer
    Thursday, February 3, 2011 @ 6:45 PM
    I typed so much just now but the comp. hanged and EVERYTHING disappeared.
    Forget it,I'm not going to retype everything so let's just go to the best part.

    Found this AWESOME video on Ssangchu Heaven.Thanks bittersweet3881 for making my day! :D

    Victoria Song. ♥
    @ 1:07 AM
    Happy Belated Birthday Victoria!♥

    Stay pretty and dorky!^^ Continue to be a great leader of f(x)! <3
    Your b'day was over 1 hour and 9 mins ago.): Well.....never mind.

    Had reunion dinner at Gramp's house today.
    Felt really really bored cause no comp.): Was looking forward to going home.
    Went to Chinatown to walk around after dinner.
    Crowded ttm.Some asshole dirtied my shirt.Tsk. :@
    Saw many familiar faces also.(:
    && Painted my nails YELLOW!

    Labels: , ,

    There's no more meaning in life.
    Wednesday, February 2, 2011 @ 12:47 PM

    Life is empty and meaningless now.You ought to know how I feel.

    Thank God school was only until 10 today.I don't think I can wait until 2+.
    CNY celebration was boring.
    I only liked the singing and the dance.Oh,and the guitar part also.
    CNY is here but no excitement at all.
    I just want to stay at home the whole CNY.
    I don't even look forward to reunion dinner.Hiaz.
    Had brunch with Lavinia and Nerine at Burger King today.
    Sent her IU songs then bused home.

    You don't know how much I wish you didn't do that.
    You don't know how much I wished we were still good friends.
    YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MUCH I MISS YOU.
    And how empty life feels without you.
    It's like everything has no meaning anymore.
    It's so hard for me to laugh and smile normally.
    It's so hard not to think of you when every single thing reminds me of you.
    It's so hard not to tear now and then when I think about you.
    You're one of the best person I've met and yet it wasn't meant to last.
    WHY?

    Every person needs a best friend to make her laugh when she thinks she'll never smile again.
    I think the only person capable of that is you.

    Labels: , ,

    I LIKE YOU.YOU LIKE ME.
    Tuesday, February 1, 2011 @ 8:23 PM
    & I like you!

    Labels: